![]() ![]() Are you willing to take responsibility for his actions? Mr. Lieutenant Brutus: Well, he looks like a fruitcake to me. Mr Bean: Brace yourself! Lieutenant Brutus: He's a genius, huh? David Langley: That's what they tell me. Bean: Why don't you get another ticket? Could be more fun second time round. David Langley: No, no, no, doctor, that's not for the TV, that's for the- ĭavid Langley: Incredible! you set? Mr. David Langley: Doctor, we should make a move. At least he has not mentioned it in any of his recent songs. But so far as I know, Mr Jovi knows absolutely nothing about 19th-century Impressionism. The man has had two great hairstyles in the last ten years, which is an achievement not to be sniffed at. David Langley: I've got nothing against Jon Bon Jovi. David Langley: Jon Bon Jovi? To unveil, "Whistler's Mother"? Bernice Schimmel: Yes. Now that is brilliant.īernice Schimmel: I genuinely believe that we could get Jon Bon Jovi. David: Ach! That is brilliant! If only more scholars would do that, just sit and look, not lecture and write and argue, but just sit and look at the paintings themselves. Tell me, doctor, what exactly is your position at the gallery? Mr. I must confess, I've never actually read any of your work. Lieutenant Brutus: Well, you could certainly use some.ĭavid Langley: Well, sir, an unorthodox start but I never expected things with a man of your caliber to be normal. Bean, are you presently on any kind of medication? Mr. Slowly place it on the floor and take three steps back! LAX Police Officer 1: What is this? LAX Police Officer 2: I don't know. LAX Police Officer 1: Carefully take out your weapon, holding the butt with two fingers only. LAX Police Officer 1: Police! Get on him now! LAX Police Officer 3: Move it! LAX Police Officer 1: Police! Come on! Come on, watch it! Watch it! Everybody, out of the way! Number Seven, a 415, man with a gun heading into zone 10, terminal 2! Get the team over here now! Get out of the way! Get out of the way! Move it! Move! Move! Move! Police! Coming through! LAX Police Officer 1: Come on, lady! Watch it! Move! There he is! There he is! Move! Move! Move! Police! Everyone on the floor! Now! Old Woman: Not you, sweetie. Bean is a genius at the very highest order! Kevin Langley: Hey, what's wrong with Meat Loaf's butt? David Langley: Oh, come on, everybody! It's gonna be great! Dr. ![]() David Langley: Jennifer, no one is asking you to marry him! Jennifer Langley: I don't know why we have these family conferences if Dad's already made up his mind. Jennifer Langley: Yeah, and that's if we get lucky. David Langley: Okay, so he's gonna look like Meat Loaf's butt. ![]() Jennifer Langley: Come on, the guy's gonna be a creep. Hey, for all you know, he could be very cute. It doesn't matter! What I'm saying here is that Dr. Kevin Langley: Yeah, like "What is an intrauterine device"? David Langley: I think more like "What's the meaning of life?" Kevin Langley: I never asked you that. David Langley: Kevin, you know how sometimes you ask me questions that I can't answer. Well, at number one with the bullet is Dr. David Langley: Come on, it's gonna be great! Let's say there's a chart of the most intelligent people you've ever met in your lives. I don't know the difference between Picasso and a car crash.ĭialogue Jennifer Langley: You're kidding.Tell him his is a butt I would dearly love to kick.I guess the long on the short of it: I wish I'd never been born. I've given my life to art and from here on in, the only art I will get anywhere near are the pictures I draw on the pavement hoping passersby will throw nickels in my hat.It's a picture of a mad old cow who he thought the world of. Whistler was perfectly aware that his mother was a hideous old bat who looked like she'd had a cactus lodged up her backside, he stuck with her, and even took the time to paint this amazing picture of her. And as I've learned, by staying with my best friend, David Langley and his family, families are very important. well, this picture is worth such a lot of money, because. Why was it worth this man, here, spending fifty million of your American dollars on this portrait? And the answer is. ![]() Secondly, and I'm getting quite near the end of this. Because if it was really small, you know, microscopic, then hardly anyone would be able to see it, which would be a tremendous shame. So, what have I learned that I can say about this painting? Well, firstly, it's quite big, which is excellent. And my job is to sit and look at paintings. ![]()
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